(LOL I see what you did there. xD)
But then you accidentally accepted someone else's trade for the GlitterDialga.
I ate all my candy.

Your teeth fell out. And for the purpose of making this more cruel, you needed to spend all your money on false teeth.
I had more pencils. (No seriously, I have to ask someone else to lend me one 24/7)

(Ik that feel. I had like 30 pencils at the beginning of those school year, but I either would have them stolen, "borrowed", or they'd come back with boogers/bite marks/etc all over them. :/)
But then the school bully beat you up and stole all the pencils.
The school bully got expelled! :D

The kid that the bully bullied became the bully and started to bully you.

Real Madrid won the Champion's League Final.

But then they lost their very next game.
I fed my dog. :I

Until you realized it was cat food.

I'm Batman.

Then Superman came and punched you in the face. :/
I caught all the Dunsparce.

All the Dunsparce you caught attacked you on purpose.
I'm Goku's daughter.

and your mother is vegeta :P

i got 1 million followers on facebook...

Then you realise that they all are fake accounts created to prank people who think they are famous
I am the new James bond in the bond series

no, you don't, you are just a rubber bond :P

i have received an iphone5 :)

You're walking down a crowded street, holding your new iphone5. Someone bumped to you and you dropped it. Now it's broken and you can't use it anymore.

I won 5 50-50trades in a row :)

You lose the next 15 to me :)
A spider bit me and I am spider man 2 now

The spider which bit you is poisonous, so not long after you become spider man 2, you fell ill and gets bedridden for your whole life.

I got a pet dog as a birthday gift

The dog had rabies or something and it bit you.

I made my bed. :）